Saturday, May 26, 2012

Furcadia and the Fact I'm Now Obsessed with my Online Persona

*pokes title*  That's a good summary.  Well, on Furcadia, I just bought two floxes for life (that means they NEVER EVER GO AWAY).  What's a flox?  The picture above is what a flox is.  I've wanted a flox since the second grade, when I first joined Furcadia.  And I got two, one for my main alt, Kunabee (hmm, that sounds familiar), and another for an alt where it will be part of her character (Arielle Medinemor).  I also got six port spaces.  What am I going to DO with six port spaces?  I don't know.
(oh, by the way: port spaces are where you can put customized little pictures of your Furcadia person).  I'm hoping that I can convince my friends or some considerate person to do at least one for free...
I'll also be willing to give away one of my port spaces in exhange for a portrait art.  I mean, c'mon, what do you DO with six port spaces (I could probably find something...)
This being said, for a long time now, my online persona has been "me" (aka, blond hair hazel eyes) with a floofy kitty tail and cat ears.  Upon getting my flox, the persona has changed.  She/I/whatever now has a flower on the back.  Like a flox.
So now I'm all obsessed with my online persona, BECAUSE I WANT PORT ART GOSHDANGIT!  And I'm all like, "I WANT TO MAKE A WEBPAGE... ABOUT MY PERSON... AND IT CAN BE PRETTY..."
(webs, anyone?  Put on MEEEE!, Furc characters, roleplay characters, neopets, etc. etc.... hmm.)

So now I have this whole description in my head of the online persona: "Almost always smiling, Kunabee greets the day as if it is a bright blue sky with hardly a cloud after a hundred years of rain, no matter the weather.  Sure, she gets down in the dumps, but she tries her best to be happy.  Clever, smart, and a little bit bratty, she has fun chatplaying - and being a pain in the you-know-where to just about every character."
And of course there will be MORE to it, because there has to be MORE.
but meh.

So yeah, that's what's in my head today.  AND BECAUSE I LIKE PICTURES...:
(is it just me, or is that RIDICULOUSLY cute?)

Sunday, May 6, 2012

Untitled Poem

This would be one of those times when all I want to do,
Is curl up and go away,
I need to breathe but I can't escape.
I need to feel but I can't get a break.
I am no shell, no empty person;
I feel and think and am moving; constant motion,
I'm breaking, falling, failing,
Like it happens, because people do break,
And for some reason, though I'm damaged,
I keep try and struggling; what's courage,
It's all my foolish stupidity,
I can't let go, I can't be free,
I'm an awful person; I hate being me.
Because though I try what I know doesn't change what I feel,
Knowledge is just the face that's shown,
The world will never let you go.

But you know, the really silly thing,
I still have hope and faith; I still believe.
I know there's a God above,
I know He loves me too.
I know I'm imperfect, but I'm beautiful;
I'm brilliant and kind, with just enough selfish to survive.
Sometimes I make mistakes, that's normal;
Why am I so hard on myself?
But you know, there's so much we share,
But we're so very different.
I believe that there's a way;
I believe it's hard, a solution,
That mortal eyes can't quite see;
That temporary is even eternal,
Except for the Ones we can't touch, only feel,
In our hearts, with our belief.

So I'm a broken damaged person,
How can words let me feel
Things I never knew I could?
I can't describe what it's like for me,
How happiness carries sadness,
And emotions I can't name,
But this is it, it's where I am.
In the end I can't change;
I care, the end.