Thursday, June 30, 2011

What I Know

Who promised life was easy?
Not a soul, not a single heart,
So in this damage I move on.
And, as long as I can I'll stay strong,
It's hard, it's rough,
But I keep my eyes closed,
Put my faith in the Lord,
Know that one day I'll get through.

Worthless

Wonder, wonder if it can be true,
If eternity is there,
If love still exists.

Because after a year it falls,
Or sometimes 17, 20, 100...
But once it collapses it's all left worthless.

And, staring at your face,
You know you're worthless,
It was you.

So then you turn around and change your mind,
It's brave to go on,
Scary to stay strong.

It won't repair what was there,
But you can build yourself up in time,
Even though it's still worthless.

And, staring at your face,
You pray you're not worthless,
It wasn't you.

Thursday, June 23, 2011

Questioning Lies

It's a simple request with no simple answer,
How can I be this confused?
Yes, he says and he's lying completely,
No, he says and he's lying yet more.

What's the answer to this endless question?
Does he love us or not?
Today he came, said I was the best thing that happened to him,
Oh really, then why did you scare us so?

Why did you hurt me?
It's a soft voice, fluttering around,
Forgiveness, I yell and shove it down,
But it's all in my head and he's not really forgivven.

He's making me become bitter!
No, I'm becoming bitter because of what he did.
I always thought I was stronger, better,
Looks like I'm weak after all.

After all the pain, and the hate,
Needlessly given,
Looks like its him
Who takes the cake.

I don't hate him, I can't,
When he came in today and cried,
I saw the good man inside.
Please, just make it easy.

I know he can't stay.
I don't want him too.
But I do, I want the person who's hardly there,
Once upon a time my mother says he was good.

Why does good always leave?
Bad usually leaves too,
But his is staying.
I need answers to my questioning lies.

I can't help but hate the bitterness in me,
The pit, the rock, the darkness all-consuming,
Today I saw the good man inside,
Where's he gone?

I've tried, my mom's tried, but nothing seems to work.
It repeats in my head, again and again,
Today I saw the good man inside.
But usually, it's hidden by the bad.

Monday, June 20, 2011

Gone

What is gone?
Sometimes it is leaving inside
And all that’s left is an empty shell.
Other times, it’s someone who goes away
Because they’ve stopped loving and don’t care anymore.

Gone can be the one who’s forgotten who they are
And forgotten how to care.
Or maybe it is when someone looses hope and faith
And forgets how to love
And everything is gone.

One day all we know
And all that we don’t
Will be gone,
Leaving us behind,
Empty and void.

So then why do people keep trying,
Pushing through and running,
Hoping, believing, forgetting, and loving,
Hating and glaring, ignoring,
When things will end?

It took me a while
To find the words to say
To learn of why things don’t stay the same
To learn of why there are those who try
Who hope to make it to a better place.

But now I know,
Despite beliefs, longings, and forgetting,
There is something more,
And in everyone's heart they know,
Someday, even pain will be gone too.

Saturday, June 11, 2011

Find

Silence can hold so many things,
A treasure box, a wonder, new.
Brilliant is the world if you only know how to see,
But nobody knows how to see
Past the hate and shame and pain,
Bitterness turning gray,
Nothing's ever into simplicity.

The one who understands is gone away,
And the one who dares to try never stays,
And those who fade into the crowd are everywhere.
It's blind as follow-the-leader comes along,
Too scared to try, too scared to stay,
Terrified to go.

And the step is taken, the breath is taken,
Breathe, just breathe and let it out,
Take it in there's brilliance,
So hard to see the worth
When everything turns to gray.

Left as empty husks despised,
We were filled with hate but hate just steals.
Love is forgotten but it always was,
And those who hope can only be naive.

Who here used to believe? Everybody
We can't ever forget the days of faith.
Where's all the faith?

So the bleak world comes crashing in,
And it's made strange and bitter and filled with hate.

So we run away to find the good things.

Thursday, June 9, 2011

Remain

Shaking hands, bitter taste,
Wait, and wait, and wait,
Deep breath in, slow breath out,
Ebb and flow, ebb and flow.
Take that brave step forward, little one,
Your journey has barely begun.

Weakly comes the darkness bright,
Flooded with bitter light,
As right is wrong and wrong is right,
Good and bad fight the same side;
But we're all alike, aren't we dear,
Unseen glories echoing near.

Oh but this world is just sad and bad,
Turned cold and hot with bitter hate,
And everything that is creation,
Shall fall to destruction;
For when we decide we are the better,
Nobody is good.

So brokenly the bodies lay,
The hearts ripped out in the sand,
Hope was once, hope was grand,
And dark and light hope is no more.
So fade away just like the rest,
The tears of memories fall.

And carefully there are those who sew them all together,
Who fix the wars and fix the bitter,
They are killed faster then most,
And less and less are around,
The hate shall win,
But the love will sound.