Thursday, June 23, 2016

Fight or Flight

So I'm on my way to work.

I'm at Nine Mile Station waiting for the bus and there's about five people with clipboards asking people "Are you registered to vote?"

Normally, I'd be happy to talk with them, but I'm on the bus schedule that's half an hour later than my normal because I missed the bus by being ten feet away from the bus stop when it came. This threw my mood off.

So all five of them, in turn, ask the question. The first one I just furiously shake my head at and walk briskly away from. The second one I manage to say "yes" before I have to move away (he cuts me off and doesn't let me get past him until I manage to give my very panicked answer, which lets him know something is wrong and he finally lets me pass).

The third I straight-up run from, and same with the fourth.

Flight or fight has kicked in and now I'm flinching, jumping, cringing away from everyone who gets too close. The fifth attempts to ask me anyway and I nearly run out in front of a car because I'm panicking and can't think straight.

People, if someone is flinching, hyperventilating, and seems jumpy, do not approach them unless it is to ask "hey, do you need help calming down?"

Because I'm finally on the bus and my fight or flight is gone but I still feel anxious and exposed despite positioning myself to minimize that feeling.

And now I'm scared something is going to go wrong, too, because anxiety is a little bitch.

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