Waiting

EDIT: I'd like to mention that the 'waiting' in this poem isn't waiting for death.  Read the last two stanzas to find out what the 'waiting' is for.  Thank you.

With a weak-willed thought, she
Spins and turns it around, yet
There is no meaning in a place such as this,
Blindly she wanders into pure emptiness,
But emptiness is the soul's curse,
And the blessing is love,
However both are broken as time comes.

Searching for a right that never was,
Will be, or is, an impossible quest
That will always fail, but like persist
Flies people keep trying;
Yes, we're as worth as much as the dirt we walk on,
Blood that runs red turns to either green or gold,
And is stepped on in the return
Of loss, and there are tears,
But they don't mean a thing.

She stares at the sun and she lets it get her drunk,
She turns and tilts and is just stuck,
But that's the way of the world you see: your thoughts,
They shall burn you more than anything else,
Because in love, it is tempered by hate,
For when there is someone you love,
There will be times when hatred consumes,
And you'll forget all your values and rules,
Like fire, like flames, they will become ash,
But strength comes until the very last, and
Bravely she states words unsaid,
'I will be waiting,' and dawn will begin.

As the moon disappears though it is full,
And the sun means nothing but fear until gone,
Suddenly it all speaks, and life gets a new dawn;
So with love she walks, far far away,
Looks like waiting will wait for another day,
And the ones that loved her - and she loved too! - they
Will be watching her destruction of self,
Until the world ends at least one will wait,
But when she comes back all will forget,
And on wings of gold she soars above,
While blood pools from red to green, not a pretty kind,
And all that added up consumes heart and mind.

So subtraction begins, and she forgets self,
Waiting's too hard, she decides and is lost,
And then the cycle will begin all over again,
'I will be waiting' is the sleight of hand,
The only faith that any one has,
Is that at last someone will get it right,
And as a new time begins so will faith,
And the hope that was waiting will finally say,
'I've been waiting all this time for someone to believe,
And now at last the belief is achieved,
So the gift that's been given is finally here,
There will no longer be the emptiness to fear.'

But the time will come, and come again,
And in fate's twisted humor, all will end,
And the hope that is waiting will try and spring out,
But nobody cares, and love is not what it is about;
For we all start in morals, we all start as friends,
But at long last it ends, and enemies again.
So one of these days, we can hope and we can pray,
Finally there will be a new way.